Vijay
Kumar: Childhood
Born
in a small Hamlet situated near the Ganges canal on the out skirts of Roorkee
town in the state of Uttar Pradesh (India), Khanjarpur village is reminiscent
of those glorious days when Hinduism in India was at its best. A care free life
supported by loving parents was still a privilege for the poor who could not or
aim for something better or higher in life! The village life nurtured in me a
sense of belonging ... An inherent feeling that someday I will have to return
what I gained from my parents and Mother earth. The pride I felt on being an Indian,
a true Hindu after listening to the various stories of the pre-independence era
inculcated in me a feeling of nationalism.
If
I were to search for the real values of life later in my life then I had to be
a truthful person from the beginning itself, was a feeling which existed with
me at every stage of life. In my dreams I used to seat myself on the throne of
King Vikramaditya and ask myself of the impurities which remained in me. This
process did wonders and since my birth all misgivings I had indulged in came to
my notice one by one be they small or big. Whether I had eaten some sweets unknown
to all or I had spoken various lies on different occasions to gratify my wanton
desires, all stood before me as if I was a living testimony to them. I prayed
to God to be forgiven for all deeds committed knowingly or unknowingly in this
or earlier lives. I noticed as days passed by that my conscience was getting more
and more lighter ... the purity for which I had inherently longed was becoming
a part of my childhood life. What a noble experience it was!
My
father worked in a governed department, a kilometer away from our house. Watching
him go on a bicycle made me think that I had to work hard if I were to get a bicycle
ever in my life (How will I learn to ride the bicycle was the biggest question
which kept ringing in my ears for years together).
My
mother tongue was Hindi in which I was slightly fluent from the beginning but
to think of learning English was beyond my comprehension. I never even dreamt
of learning English ever. I had doubts whether one born in a village was entitled
to learn English How happy I was when I declared to my mom that if I ever learn
ABCD in my life then I shall distribute sweets to the whole village. That was
when I was around six years of age and had a inherent feeling that someday my
persistence of learning the basics of English would pay off. How optimistic I
was even as a child, perhaps result of my earlier manifestations You had to have
a seed of a mango plant if you want to reap mangos at a later date. The Atman
(soul within me) which was to later manifest in life seemed to guide me, a grace
of God which is available only to the privileged few.
Schooling :
My parents
did to me what I failed to do later in my life for my own children ... my two
beloved daughters. I know for absolute certain that God has in store for me much
more than what I or my family would need in their lifetime but the looming clouds
of ignorance makes it extremely difficult for one to see the truth in its veiled
form.
I went
to three-four Hindi medium schools before I got admitted to an English medium
school. It was an irony of fate that Roorkee town was going to have a newly built
English medium school Christened "St. Gabriel's Academy" in the precincts of the
Army setup at Roorkee, the famous "Bengal Engineering and Sappers group (popularly
known as BEG). Run by the Christian missionaries this school turned out to be
a boon for all the residents of Roorkee. St. Gabriel's Academy was meant for boys
and it had a counterpart for girls at a different location namely "St. Ann's convent".
It was in the
third year of running, when my father decided to get me admitted to this school.
The principal brother Julian was a true academician. When he came to know of my
Hindi background he refused admission. By that time I had not even seen the school
premises but my Elder brother was already studying in the school having taken
admission a year before. He also was from a Hindi medium background but must have
fared well in the test and interview. I had great regards for my brother as he
had the knowledge of ABCD.
My father was an intelligent person. He probably read the mind of the principal
and coaxed me to train well before I went to the school for the test. I was made
to learn the difference between a chair and a table. Must have been more than
a hundred times before I reluctantly submitted to my parents that I would fare
well in the test (How deeply scared I was within cannot be explained in words
but even at that young age of my life I had extreme faith in God and somehow felt
that all would go well in the end).
At
the time of the test inspite of all prompting I had to call a chair a table and
a table a chair. My father told the principal that if asked in Hindi I would say
it right but being an English medium school he was not prone to any reason. Somehow
the principal agreed to give me a trial for about seven days and if I failed then
I would be discontinued.
Lucky
for me, the tests in Hindi got me nine and half out of 10 and the Hindi teacher
took me to the principal along with the results and requested the principal to
extend the time limit. On learning that I knew my tables up to 20 thoroughly but
in Hindi whereas none in the class went beyond 13 was a matter of consolation
for the principal. He knew that to solve a problem in mathematics it was immaterial
whether one knew the tables in Hindi or English, what mattered was if the results
arrived at were correct or not. Thereafter, it was no looking back.
Teenage :
I
did try hard in the beginning but my inherent tendencies to seek God resulted
in my getting poor grades since 9th class onwards. From sixth class onwards I
was able to come second in class and maintained this position till 8th standard.
In the first tests in my ninth class I scored zero in two subjects. My class teacher
was flabbergasted and unable to contain herself took me to the earlier class teacher
of my sixth class. Inspite of the best promptings I could not disclose to the
teachers the cause of my getting below average grades.
I
had switched over from mugging and cramming my lessons to understanding the basic
principles and laws of every subject. Someone inherently was prompting me to follow
the new path irrespective of whether or not I got good marks in various objects.
This was perhaps the most difficult and the first decision ever made by me as
a child without even consulting my parents or my teachers. I had to gain or loose
but how was not very clear to me. Somehow I felt I would only gain and there was
nothing to loose.
One
thing was very clear to me that getting marks did not matter much. What mattered
was the knowledge gained. A source so potential in nature that I may draw knowledge
from it as and when I desired. I felt that if I continued cramming my lessons
I may be considered intelligent in that particular class but what of the future
when I shall have fully forgotten what I had learnt earlier.
I got caned for the zero marking. Two canes per subject from the principal who
earlier appreciated my coming second in the class. Before the whole class he admonished
me and advised me to study hard and maintain the old record. Again, I could not
spell out the reason for such low marks. I remember taking a solemn oath within
my conscience that I really would try harder and never betray the faith the principal
had expressed in me nor get belittled in front of the whole class ever.
The marks of the cane
remained on my hand for full seven days. It also pained reminding me that there
was some virtue hidden in the new path shown by God. This was perhaps the most
important dictate of God I had in my pre-college days. To obey or not to obey
was as per my discretion which I left it on to God to take care.
This
whole episode further strengthened my belief that there is a God and if one were
to search for it sincerely, honestly and truthfully then he shall show himself.
I was right in my presumption. I also became truthfully aware of the small inner
voice which prompts us on the right path always.
The drag in my studies showed up when I got a compartment in a subject in the
board examinations of 11 th standard. Inherently I knew I would clear the same
without any hassles but for my parents it was a crucial test of time. Having appeared
for the mathematics examination I knew I was going to fail but along with it followed
a chain of thinking supported by God that I would definitely clear the same in
my second attempt.
The
fact that I would fail in mathematics was not disclosed to anybody and when the
results poured in, I could see the consternation on the face of my parents trying
to find out ways and means to disclose the results to a boy who was celebrating
his holidays 3000 kms away from home at Cochin where my father had taken up a
project. First time in my life I was to travel alone the full distance to Delhi
by train. I felt sorry for my parents and assured them that I would clear the
paper without much difficulty. They were relieved to know that I knew beforehand
I would fail and was not shocked on seeing the results.
College
days :
A lad in
search of God, how he completed 12th standard, prepared for the engineering competition
and cleared it with flying colors is un-imaginable. and here I was admitted as
a student of civil engineering and that to in the famous University of Roorkee
(formerly known as Thomason college of engineering) which stood by its name in
the field of civil engineering world-wide.
To
be admitted to a local university was a boon for my parents, probably they could
not have afforded my studies out of the town. The invincible hand of God was there
to help me all the time. Even while doing my engineering I was deeply in search
of God. Somehow somewhere I had to come face-to-face to him. There was no other
alternative. I had burnt all my bridges.
Precipitation :
Since
1993, ever since I gained Self Realization (Enlightenment) :
I
have dedicated myself in service of mankind. Compelled to leave a thriving business
& an earning sufficient for one to live comfortably & happily in a Cosmopolitan
Town like Delhi, I am trying to spread message of good will to the World community
through the Internet.
Having
reached the end part of my Cosmic career I was full of cheer as one would be on
seeing a full bloomed rose. But here I was the rose myself and there was no way
to become a bud once more. All manifestations had ended. I had come out of the
cyclic chain of Life and Death never to be born again as a human or any other
being.
My gains:
I
am able to -
Understand
the Hidden Truths of all Scriptures of all Religions of the World.
Talk to
'God, the Creator' every moment of my life.
Know that all living beings have
emanated from the same source 'the Brahman'.
Understand "Bhagavad Gita and
Upanishads"
as clear as abc
Know what are dreams
Where does one go after death
What is hell and Heaven
How a layman can conquer his desires
How can
one by controlling his Karma take absolute control of his destiny & reach any
bracket of his life (from a laborer to an Emperor).
Know the identity of
true self "the I within".
Truth behind an atman soul manifesting a body.
The ultimate truth governing the physical World.
Being my last sojourn on Mother Earth, I have to impart the Cosmic knowledge to
those who truly seek the "wisdom of the East".
No
further life after death of this body ... To Emancipate forever from the cycle
of Birth and Death... What can be more noble for atman the soul within.
One can
within this life attain Salvation ... Become
a living Mahavira, Buddha or Jesus
Christ!
Those
deeply interested in proceeding on a totally uncharted path of Self Realization
may join the mailing list on my homepage and also consider becoming a member of
World Wide Center for Self Realization (A Non profit Spiritual Organization) ...
as the funds required to maintain my Internet presence will only be through the
efforts of those sincere aspirants who truly desire to gain Self Realization in
the present life.
